Robbery

"Anytime four New Yorkers get into a cab together without arguing, a bank robbery has just taken place."
Johnny Carson, The Mammoth Book of Comic Quotes

Tourist Questions

Ed Sullivan Theater

"Questions Asked By Tourists Visiting New York City:
'Does it always smell like this?'
'Do you think we'll ever see our luggage again?'
'Which way to the emergency room?'
'How do I get to Seinfeld's apartment?'
'Which way to the hookers?'
'Do what myself?'"
David Letterman, The Mammoth Book of Comic Quotes

Run Down

Allen St.

"New York is the only city in the world where you can get deliberately run down on the sidewalk by a pedestrian."
Russell Baker, The Mammoth Book of Comic Quotes