Getting Along

"People say New Yorkers can't get along. Not true. I saw two New Yorkers, complete strangers, sharing a cab. One guy took the tires and the radio; the other guy took the engine."
David Letterman, quoted in Words to Live By

Autumn in New York City

Riverside Park

"I love autumn in New York City: The yellows, the browns, and the rust—and that's just the drinking water... Here in New York City, the leaves turn—and run."
David Letterman, Stand Up Comedy Portal

New York Survey

"Interesting survey in the current Journal of Abnormal Psychology: New York City has a higher percentage of people you shouldn't make any sudden moves around than any other city in the world."
David Letterman, Late Night with David Letterman: The Book

Police Sketch

24th Precinct

"New York is great though. If you're here and want a one of a kind souvenir be sure to take home the police sketch of your assailant."
David Letterman, The Little Red Book of New York Wisdom

Most Often Heard

Manhattan (Pixabay)

"Someone did a study of the three most often heard phrases in New York City. One is, 'Hey, taxi.' Two is, 'What train do I take to get to Bloomingdales?' And three is, 'Don't worry. It's just a flesh wound.' "
David Letterman, quoted in Uncle John's Third Bathroom Reader

Tourist Questions

Ed Sullivan Theater

"Questions Asked By Tourists Visiting New York City:
'Does it always smell like this?'
'Do you think we'll ever see our luggage again?'
'Which way to the emergency room?'
'How do I get to Seinfeld's apartment?'
'Which way to the hookers?'
'Do what myself?'"
David Letterman, The Mammoth Book of Comic Quotes

Chinese New Year

Mott St.

"Every year when it's Chinese New Year in New York, there are fireworks going off at all hours. New York mothers calm their frightened children by telling them it's just gunfire."
David Letterman, That’s Really Funny

New York Marathon

2014 TCS New York City Marathon

"I pulled a hamstring during the New York City Marathon. An hour into the race, I jumped up off the couch."
David Letterman, 1001 Pearls of Runners' Wisdom.

The Fall of Civilization

Eighth Avenue

"New York... When civilization falls apart, remember, we were way ahead of you."
David Letterman, quoted in That’s Really Funny

Traffic Signals

Fifth Avenue

"Traffic signals in New York are just rough guidelines."
David Letterman, Late Show with David Letterman