Chunk of Garlic

"In the 'Great American Melting Pot,' rural Ohio may be a lump of white flour that hasn't been stirred properly. Not that New York is any better. New York is that chunk of garlic that you bite into thinking it's potato and you can't get the taste out of your mouth all day. It all blends one you mix it, but sometimes you really have to grind it against the side."
Tina Fey, Bossypants

Status Symbol

Stroller parking area in the Brooklyn Botanic Gardens

"Large families have become a status symbol in New York. Four beautiful children named after kings and pieces of fruit are a way of saying 'I can afford a four-bedroom apartment and $150,000 in elementary school tuition fees each year. How you livin'?"
Tina Fey, Bossypants

Exercise for Anyone Who Wants to Move to New York

"It would be a great exercise for someone who thinks they want to move to New York. Sit in an enclosed space full of fumes and hold hands with a stranger for twenty minutes while everyone around you speaks a language you don't understand. If you enjoy this, you will enjoy the 6 train."
Tina Fey, Bossypants